Let It Burn/One
I watch the city burn These dreams like ashes float away Your voice I never heard Only silence let it burn - red ---- PHOENIX didn't finish hunting till past midnight. The stars were glittering in the sky when she finally gave up and headed home, a scrawny mouse clutched in her jaw--the only reward for hours of work. But, she reflected, she was lucky to get anything at all. The Crater was no happy hunting ground; the prey ran exceedingly scarce, and cats starved to death countlessly. Phoenix's greatest fear was that her sisters would meet the same fate. The dull, aching gnaw of hunger in her own belly was nothing compared to the dread she felt on days when she was forced to return home to Gale and Ray without prey. There was not a single doubt in her mind that this mouse would be split between her sisters. It would have to tide them over till their father, Bracken, got home from his most recent raid. Bracken had been away for over a week now, but that was nothing; raids took time. Phoenix's father spent the vast majority of his time away from home, traveling The Crater with his ragtag band of thieves, plundering and looting and searching for any food they could steal. In another world, perhaps this would be something that bothered Phoenix. But she couldn't afford to be choosy about her morals. Morality did not fill bellies. She respected her father for doing what needed to be done to keep his family alive. Gale and Ray didn't see it the same way. Her baby sisters didn't understand why Bracken left them alone so often, and they resented him for it. Only Phoenix was able to see the long-suffering, silent sacrifice her father made, devoting all his time to committing acts of barbarism so that his daughters could live to see another sunrise. Only Phoenix saw the empty, hollow look in Bracken's eyes when he came home; even for the meager amount of time that he wasn't on the move, he was haunted by the ghosts of those he had injured or worse in his desperate quest for food. Another one of Phoenix's fears was that her sisters would grow to hate her for spending so much time away from home as well. As this thought occurred to her, she spotted it: "home". It was a small cave dugout, earth-and-rock-walled and fringed by thick clumps of coarsegrass. Two small shapes stood on the roof: one gray, the other a pale off-white. Phoenix broke into a run, and her sisters leaped down from the house roof and raced to meet her. "You shouldn't be up," she scolded as she collided with them, lost in a mess of soft fur and purring. "It's past midnight--you have to wake up early tomorrow, do your chores..." The rest of her lecture was lost in the overwhelming purr building in her throat; she understood how lucky she was just to make it back home to them. They walked side-by-side back to the dugout, and ducked inside. While Gale and Ray split the mouse, Phoenix sunk into her nest and watched them; she was utterly exhausted, but reluctant to sleep without talking to her sisters first. "How did the chores go? Did anything happen today?" This question was, as always, laced with worry. It didn't matter how many fogstorms, explosions, or other catastrophes her sisters survived on a daily basis; Phoenix would never get over the crippling fear that someday, a fire geyser would explode near her home, or a fogstorm would come over the land before Gale and Ray could hide in the dugout, or a freak lightningstorm would hit, or marauders would attack... There were so many ways to die in the Crater, each more brutal than the next, and Phoenix knew that leaving her sisters alone all day while she hunted was both the most dangerous and most essential thing she could do. "Nothing happened today, Phoenix," said Gale, softly reassuring. "Elliot dropped by, he said there was a fogstorm down at the South End of The Crater, but that's all." Phoenix shuddered, making a mental note not to go hunting near the South End any time soon. The aftermath of a fogstorm was awful to behold; the acidic vapor burned away layers of vegetation like peeling away skin, and the surviving creatures it left in its wake were blistered and bleeding and suffering. "Elliot's okay, right?" she asked her sisters. "Yes, he's fine. He found prey--a rabbit clutch. He left us three." "Three?" Phoenix goggled. Three rabbits was an unfathomable amount of food to her. "Yes, one apiece. He said to make sure that you ate one," said Gale determinedly, her little triangular face set with triumph. "We told ''you, you have to eat." She dragged a rabbit out from behind her nest with a flourish. Both she and Ray were beaming; clearly they had been very excited to reveal this bit of luck, waiting for the unveiling all day. "Elliot should've eaten it himself..." "He says he's already got some food, and it'll all spoil if we didn't take it," said Ray, nudging the rabbit towards Phoenix. Phoenix sighed. "Keep it there. One of you eat it, or I'll give it back to Elliot when he visits tomorrow-" "We're not arguing about this, Phoenix," said Gale seriously, coming to stand beside Ray. "You have to eat it. You need your strength." Phoenix glanced from Gale to Ray, and back again. Finally realizing her sisters would not be moved on this, she muttered, "I wish you guys weren't as stubborn as me." Triumphantly, they slapped each other's tails happily and settle down in their nests. Within minutes, they were asleep, snoring peacefully. They never slept soundly without Phoenix home; it was the reason, she knew, that they waited for her till midnight. Otherwise, the nightmares came upon them, relentless and cruel. She couldn't stand the thought of her sisters, screaming in pain as they were tortured with the bloody visions of their own minds, so she always hurried home as soon as possible, and they woke when she woke at dawn. As she took the first bite of rabbit, her stomach revved to life, expanding from its shrunken, pitiful state. Within no time, she had gulped the entire rabbit, full for the first time in what felt like forever. Drowsily, she lay her head on her paws and fell asleep. ◭◭◭ ◭◭◭ ◭◭◭ Screams rent the night and jolted Phoenix awake. Quick as a flash, she bolted out of the dugout, peering out at the horizon. The border between land and sky was lit a fiery shade of vermilion. Smoke poured upward, blocking out the stars that had shone so brightly a few hours ago. It must be just before dawn, but she had no way of telling, with the sky obscurred by orange-gray haze. A fire geyser had gone off. A dangerous part of The Crater's landscape, the holes in the ground were normally harmless, belching out steam and ash... but sometimes one got triggered, letting loose a towering stream of flame and toxic gas, turning any living thing to tinder. "Phoenix?" whimpered a small voice. Gale stood at her shoulder, and Ray at the other. "That's where Elliot lives..." She gestured with her tail in the direction of the flames. Swallowing, Phoenix said, "I know..." Transfixed, she stared at the inferno; it was a fair distance away, but she could still feel the air grow unnaturally hot around her, and the sky seemed to quiver in the waves of heat thrown up by the fire. The foul odor of burning fumes and radiation hit her nose, and, coughing, she drove her sisters back into the dugout. "Aren't you going to find Elliot?" begged Ray. "I can't run into the fire, Ray," Phoenix said harshly. "What good would that do?" "''He'd run into a fire for you," her sister said mutinously. Phoenix shot her a venomous glare, suddenly furious with her innocent trust and childish conviction that the right thing to do was always easy, always a simple decision... "ELLIOT!" screamed Gale. A cat was running towards them, a dark outline against the reddish hue of the air. Gale and Ray nearly trampled Phoenix in their haste to get to the black-and-white tom approaching. "Gale, Ray!" he called in relief. "You're okay! Where's Phoenix?" His dark gray eyes landed on her, and his face lit brighter than the fire behind him. "Phoenix!" She forced her face into a stiff smile. "Elliot. Glad you're okay," she said truthfully. He walked towards her, but she jerked away, turning back to the dugout. "Come inside," she said. "We'll wait and see if the fire comes any closer." The other three followed her in. Elliot joined her at the entrance to the dugout while Gale and Ray headed back to their nests. "What happened? How bad is it?" Phoenix asked Elliot. "My home's destroyed," he said sadly, his solemn gaze dancing with the firelight's reflection. "But most cats got out; everyone's got an evacuation plan. Robin and Killian didn't make it, though. She got trapped under that old log they live under... he stayed to save her..." Disgustedly, Phoenix slammed her claws into the ground. "He should've saved himself!" she hissed. "Killian... He was such a good cat... He was one of Father's best friends..." "So was Robin," said Elliot. "But she was as good as dead, the moment she got stuck! Why would he stay--the fire spreads so quickly... the fool," she snarled. "He loved her," said Elliot simply. Phoenix scowled at him. "More's the pity. Who's going to tell Carter?" "Carter can take care of himself, he's proven that. He joined up with your father, didn't he?" asked Elliot, a note of ice coming into his voice. Her anger grew. "Yes, Father, who you look down upon from your seat of self-righteousness-" "I don't-" "-thinking you're better than him. Well, you don't know what it's like, to have to care for them." She jerked her head back to the den, where her sisters slept fitfully. "You don't know because you don't have a family!" Something dangerous flashed in Elliot's usually calm gray eyes. "I don't know? I don't care? You, telling me that! You, who would have Killian leave Robin to die alone, consumed in the flames!" "YOU TELL CARTER THEN!" Phoenix screamed. "TELL CARTER THAT BOTH HIS PARENTS ARE DEAD!" "Why don't you?! He's your father's pal, isn't he? Roaming The Crater, stealing from others and calling it a noble effort to provide for their families." Elliot's tone turned bitter with disgust. "YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE-" "Phoenix?" Gale had woken up with all the shouting. Both Elliot and Phoenix fell silent immediately. "Go to sleep, Gale," Phoenix said sternly. "Morning will come and the fire will be gone." "Yes," said Elliot, sounding choked. He wouldn't look at Phoenix. "Go back to sleep. Peace to you." After wavering uncertainly for a second, Gale dipped her head at him. "Peace to you," she mumbled, and returned to her nest beside Ray. "You can stay the night," said Phoenix in a voice as acidic as a fogstorm. "Seeing as your home's ash." "Thanks," said Elliot in a clipped tone. "I'll stay by the entrance, keep watch." Phoenix lingered for a second, torn as to whether she should thank him for the rabbits he'd left. Finally, with a weary sigh, she left him alone and dropped into her nest. ◭◭◭ ◭◭◭ ◭◭◭ Phoenix's dreams were haunted by screaming--but a different kind from the horrid, tortured wails that the fire geyser had caused earlier that night. This screaming was distinctive; it had words, and it's mission was not to express hurt, but to do the hurting. Visions of a ginger tom and a pale silver she-cat danced across her shut eyes. The she-cat was howling insults, the tom alternating between defending himself and begging the she-cat for something... something she could not give him... her heart... her loyalty... Then the she-cat was lifting a scornful, dainty chin and prancing away--at this point Phoenix's mind seemed to decide that a little nonsensical embellishment was necessary, and the she-cat was suddenly wreathed in acid fog and began breathing fire. It was at this point that Phoenix woke from the nightmare, breathing heavily and with her heart slamming in her chest. The dugout was quiet. Gale and Ray slept curled together like they had as kits, their small faces peaceful and free of troubles. Elliot was a dark, stoic form at the entrance; Phoenix knew just by looking at him that he hadn't slept all night. "G'morning," she said, her voice hoarse from smoke inhalation and disuse. He jumped at the sound; Phoenix grinned in a dry sort of manner. "Did I scare you?" she asked as she walked up to join him at the entrance. Together, they peered out at a dreary, unappealing gray dawn. Smoke and ash filled more of the sky than the clouds did, and the sun was pitiful and an unnatural shade of blaring red-orange. "You didn't scare me," said Elliot gruffly. "How's The Crater?" He sighed. "It's been quiet the past hour. Everyone's either escaped or..." He trailed off. There was a pause, and then both of them spoke at once. "I'm sorry about-" "Yesterday, I shouldn't have-" They both broke off, then Phoenix laughed tensely. "It was, ah, a high-emotion moment. We said things we didn't mean." "Agreed. I'm sorry." "Me too." Elliot took a deep breath. "Listen, Phoenix-" "Father?" Phoenix leaped to her paws, looking past Elliot, out onto the plain--which, despite being as scrubby and ugly as it had been a few minutes ago, suddenly seemed a paradise to her. A ginger tom was walking towards them. His pelt was clotted with blood in some places, but there weren't as many wounds as there were patches of blood; not all of it was his own. Phoenix hardly noticed, and she wouldn't have cared if she did. She flew out to meet him. "I can't believe it!" "Phoenix," Bracken said warmly, his voice tired. He glanced past her, eyes landing on Elliot. Instantly, his face shuttered off, and Elliot looked away immediately--but again, Phoenix was too absorbed in her own relief and joy to see it. "Are Gale and Ray all right? I saw the effects of the fire geyser... and there was a fogstorm near the South End." "We're all okay," Phoenix assured him. Letting out a heavy breath, Bracken said, "Good. I have prey for you all. But first, we need to talk. It's serious." end of part one.